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Post by Biblically Accurate Angel on Jun 24, 2023 16:40:25 GMT -5
"Your daughter's hand in marriage!"
Sir Topham Hatt spluttered. "She's fourteen!!"
"Nah, I'm just kidding. Actually I'd like your railtour to advertise our business. We're a small antique shop that's been falling on hard times lately. If you pay for the expenses needed to renovate the coaches, the labor fee will balance out with the free publicity."
Sir Topham turned to Alaine. "Well, what do you think?"
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Meanwhile the American Colorpeople had been sent out to take care of the prison breakout. Although, they were finding something mightily strange happening to their psyches.
"Why am I suddenly incredibly attracted to you?" Jimmy Johnson, the Dude in Red, asked Gordon Fitzgerald, the Dude in Blue.
"I dunno, but I'm feeling the same thing... why the hell are Helen and Veronica making out over there??" The Dudettes in Aquamarine and Violet were absolutely going at it.
"Obama must have hit the wrong button again," muttered Jonah Anderson, the Dude in Periwinkle. "This wouldn't be happening if Romney won the election."
Johnson rolled his eyes. "Well look at the bright side - at least we don't have someone like, oh, I dunno, Donald Trump in office..."
Meanwhile...
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Post by Toz76 on Jun 26, 2023 1:14:53 GMT -5
The World Steam Tour was arriving in Paris, France. They were going to spend a few days there before proceeding to the next stop, mingling with the French engines.
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Post by Biblically Accurate Angel on Jul 29, 2023 19:18:05 GMT -5
It was highly unfortunate, then, that they were only now learning for the first time that Gordon was highly racist against the French.
"Jacques, is it?" he grumbled to a smart red mixed traffic engine. "How about you come over here and Jacques my di--"
"Gordon!" spluttered Henry.
"Look, Henry," he said, "these engines aren't like us. They're different. They're weak."
"You are stereotyping!" rebutted a horrified Henry. "I'm ashamed in you. I thought I knew you better than this..."
"Tough crap," Gordon snorted. "I mean look at them."
Henri, รdouard, Canard, and Jacques were eyeing the new visitors angrily.
"Hรฉ, les salopes!" shouted Gordon. "Pourquoi ne pas me caresser les couilles, connards!"
"Wait... can you speak French?" Henry was now as confused as he was horrified.
"Of course," replied Gordon. "To fight the enemy, one must first sink down to his level. To defeat the French, one must first learn the ways of the French, and that includes besting them at their own... weak... vulgar... tongue."
"You disgust me," said Henry.
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Post by Toz76 on Jul 30, 2023 0:40:46 GMT -5
The French controller arrived to speak to Sir Topham Hatt.
"Bonjour, monsieur Hatt. I am Chevalier Haute-Jambon Chapeauxx, le French controller."
"A pleasure to meet you, Chevalier Chapeauxx. And a heartfelt merci for our use of your railyard."
"Oui, oui, of course, of course! Everything I have is at your disposal. These two tank engines, Thomeaux and Perc'est, shall be on hand to assist."
"Heureux de pouvoir vous aider, Chevalier!" Perc'est said with a cheerful "le peep peep" of his whistle.
As the Sudrian engines entered the main yard, they couldn't help but feel uneasy. Everything looked oddly similar to their home back on Sodor, but slightly different, as if someone had put a beret on Tidmouth and leaned a few baguettes against it.
"I find it all deeply unsettling," Emily whispered to Duck as they settled in on a siding.
Gordon, meanwhile, was already making enemies of the two tank engines. Thomeaux in particular delighted in antagonizing him.
"Debout, fainรฉant! Travail un peu ca ne changera. Je parie que tu n'es pas capable de m'attraper!"
"Oh, that little French tin kettle! Although, I can't help but feel an odd sense of deja vu from what Thomeaux just said to me..." Gordon muttered to himself.
(Listen I had to track down the French dub of Thomas and Gordon on YouTube for this joke so if the French is bad blame whoever dubbed the show)
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