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Post by Tug on Sept 17, 2017 0:17:09 GMT -5
More SOM Spoilers: {Spoiler} Meanwhile, in Castle Eldrid, Metalicana had gathered Sebaastian, his loyal butler, and Lord Ainz Ooal Gown, his advisor. Sebaastian was serving tea to the two, Metalicana was in his Human-Dragon form, as the two discussed formal matters...
"It seems SOM is progressing quite well since you summoned our entire force to Sodor my Lord..." said Ainz in a dignified manner
"Yes, Raios and his Sins were the scouts to see how far VEC had progressed since their return. It was alarming when Sterben's technology detected the return of their organizations' heavy hitters, especially aorund the time they had that showdown with the damn Colorfolk..." growled the Dragon King as he watched Sebaastian pour more tea in his cup
"More sugar my Lord?"
"No thank you..."
"Yes sir..." answered Sebaastian as he stood by at the ready...
"So my Lord, what are your future plans?" inquired Ainz
"I'm training up Zemlya to become the Ultimate Dragon she was made to be, as well as getting 'those two' ready to take my moniker... Argh... They make me want to put Vados in charge instead..." replied Ainz
"Might I inquire why you are adamant on those two in particular? Wouldn't the Mistress make a much better candidate?" asked Ainz
"She would, but it is fate, I once met a man and his group, they appear during the rise and fall of every era, one of their members records it, but their leader, he seems to know more about this world than he lets on... He is honestly the scariest individual I have ever met... He may be tied to the Titans but I have no idea how... Anyway, he once told me, a Son of Darkness would be needed to lead the chosen group into a brand new light... He is a neutral individula, so I assumed he was telling me one of my son's would succeed me and be able to bring SOM into the age I've always dreamed of, so I am training them to be ready for this prophesied day..." answered Metalicana
"I see, no wonder you had me guide Redfox..."
"Yes, Redfox is a thickheaded fool but has the qualities of natural born leader, he convinced Tartaros to join us so I'll give him that, while Raios draws people to him though has yet to learn the true reasons for leadership and thus always ends up failing... They're my sons and with the issues between the two of them I rather have Aremur's son Doruk the half-giant idiot lead my forces..." remarked the Dragon
"Speaking of Doruk, he is strong, but what are you going to do with him?"
"When I removed Raios from dealing with the Frost Giants I sent him to take over leading Raios' soldiers to see his leadership skills, and the results were... mediocre... By himself when he doesn't have to care for others he is a monster, but in charge of others, he is useless... Seems that Sword that's been controlling him since we met has been no help either... In the end I put Raios' top lieutentant, Najenda I think, in charge and she defeated and captured the Frost Giants easily..."
"Hmm... That is alarming, any plans to rectify that?" asked Ainz
"When that sword isn't in control, his naivety goes along great with Zemlya, who seems closest to him since Aremur put them on "playdates" together, plus Monet who is always around my concubine has grown attached to him as well... I keep him here in this castle to be monitored, without supervision he could run wild and might actually destroy the world on his own... His immense strength for someone of his species and that demonic sword do not make a good pairing unwatched..."
"Truly, I see that is the wisest option my Lord..."
"Anyway, how goes Deszeld, all the construction is finished I hear?" asked Metalicana
"Yes, Stein's forests that surround the city are up, the anti-good forcefield as also up and running, as well as Leo's 'Oro Paradiso' Casino and Sterben's Hospital. Dolor's Coliseum is another feature of the city. Impel Down has been successfully relocated, and the spot for this castle next to the city's Town Hall and memorial to the 'Fallen Members of SOM' as well as the portal to the Demon Realm. Many other facilities are up with Ultear's Bastions and Clockworks monitoring the streets for anything wrong. In all, Deszeld City is ready are for their king..."
"Good, now I have a plan to eliminate our enemies, the Vile Evil Confederacy, but first, Sebaastian, have Mantle fetch Riddell and his forces, I have a new assignment for them..."
"Yes my Lord, Mantle!" shouted Sebaastian
A Minotaur in a well tailored suit cam into the room...
"Yes Sebaastian Sir?"
"Fetch Solomon Riddell and his top Lieutentants, Keiko, Verrona, and Ceros was it, and bring them to the castle immediately..." ordered the Head Butler
"Wouldn't Charlotte be better for this task, I mean her sister works under Riddel..." said Mantle before he was interrupted...
"This was a task directly assigned to you by the Dragon Lord himself! ARE YOU REBELLING AGAINST HIS WISHES?" scowled Sebaastian with a look of death
"No Sebaastian Sir, I did not realize it was a direct order, my will was foolish, I will be back immediately, May the Dragon King Reign eternally..." replied Mantle in defeat as he bowed his head shamefully
"Now go!" shouted Sebaastian, "I'm sorry my Lords for the foolishness you witnessed, a punishment will be brought accordingly since he interrupted your discussion when he returns..." bowed Sebaastian in shame
"It is alright Sebaastian, I respect your decision on how to treat your subordinates I assigned, thought treat him lightly... Family is a big part of SOM, always remember that..." replied Metalicana
"Yes my Lord, I was foolish as well, I will punish him lightly then as your will deems so..." answered Sebaastian as he went back to standing at attention next to the table as the two continued their tea...
"Well my Lord, about that plan you mentioned..."
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Post by Toz76 on Oct 5, 2017 0:32:01 GMT -5
As the colorfolk dealt with cleaning the destruction wrought by Eyes and the War Ensemble, Man In Blue and Fark Devonshire met on a hilltop overlooking Brendam.
"So." Man In Blue dug his foot in the dirt and looked at the ground, embarrassed.
"Well?" Fark asked, fighting a losing battle with a self-satisfied smirk of triumph.
"Thank you." Man In Blue spat. "Your intervention allowed us to defeat Eyes and the War Ensemble."
"You're very welcome." Fark smiled. "It was my pleasure."
"I suppose you'll be leaving now ," Man In Blue asked, his tone making it clear that this was not a polite enquiry.
"Actually, that's part of the reason I agreed to this meeting. I figured you should be the first to know. We've infiltrated a rogue branch of VEC. Apparently, they stole a magical remote from Thomas The Tank Engine, which allowed him to be kidnapped by the real VEC. We can't allow that to happen again, which is why we're building a base at Brendam Docks. The Guild Of Death, Island of Sodor Division, East Anglian Dispatch."
"GODISDEAD? Isn't that a terrible name for several reasons?"
"Ten ships under the command of Bjarnisson, Onyx, and myself will be permanently stationed there. Morgan and Hunt will be carrying out independent operations at the same time." Fark went on.
"Wait..." Man In Blue said, the full implications of what Fark was saying beginning to sink in.
"That's right. We're neighbors!" Fark said with fake cheerfulness.
"We will destroy your base if need be." Man In Blue shot back.
"Fine. We can rebuild. It's mostly a drydock for our ships anyway. Our personnel are staying on the ships, except for me and a few others, who are staying at a secret location that you'll never find, despite the fact that it's been mentioned before, exactly once."
"This is ridiculous! Even with your armbands on the "good" setting, you're still dishonest manipulators."
"No, we're just Chaotic as opposed to your Lawful nature." Fark replied. "There are flaws to both approaches."
He was going to say more, but he was interrupted by Man In Blue, who let out an animalistic scream of frustration. Fark could tell he'd gone to far, and reached out to put a hand on Man In Blue's shoulder.
"They really do like you, you know."
Man In Blue looked up. "Who?"
"You know, the, ya know, ah..." Fark gesticulated towards the sky. "The writers."
"If they like me so much, why does all this bad stuff keep happening to me?"
"It's because they like you that they use you so much. You're the closest thing this damn thing has to a protagonist. You're flawed, but at the end of the day, you have something none of the other faction leaders has."
"What?"
"Relatability. I may be an arrogant bastard, BM may be a religious fanatic, Raios may be a power-hungry dick, but your flaws make you more human, not less. In a way, I envy you, Daniel. You get to be portrayed sympathetically. Whenever we appear together, my negative traits are played up, because I'm the bad guy. I don't want to be the bad guy. But if I have to, at least I have a worthy nemesis."
Man In Blue looked up. "What are you trying to say?"
Fark extended his hand. "Frenemies?"
Man In Blue looked at the proffered hand with suspicion for a second, before coming to a decision. "Frenemies." He decided, shaking Fark's hand.
"Excellent." Fark chuckled.
Man In Blue smirked. "I look forward to taking you down next time we go head to head."
"As do I."
As Man In Blue turned to leave, Fark added: "Also, little tip from my intelligence team- Melody is thinking of breaking up with you since your relationship has begun to stagnate. I suggest you take things to the next level, and fast."
When Man In Blue turned around, Fark was gone.
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Post by Toz76 on Nov 2, 2017 23:29:19 GMT -5
THIS POST IS SO LONG I WILL BE FUTURE POSTING IT IN FOUR PARTS
PART 1) Don't Split The Party PART 2) An Offer You Can't Refussssssssssssssse PART 3) Lord Ainz Does The Exposition PART 4) Based On A True Story
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DON'T SPLIT THE PARTY
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Bone Andrea landed the chariot somewhere in the middle of the city. Omninous brown buildings that somehow looked old and intimidating despite being new builds loomed.
As Bone Andrea and Moltana unloaded their prisoners, a tall, shadowy figure emerged from a nearby archway. The figure of a snakeman appeared, with a few more of his kind in tow.
"My name is Ssssssssssssssalfrasssssssssssssslatar. Zemlya ssssssssssssent me to ekssssssssssssamine the prisonersssssssssssss." The lead snakeman hissed.
"I hope you realize what you're doing, random mook." Woman In Orange snapped suddenly. "I'm a colorwomen, and he's a fan favorite. Kidnapping us will lead to your downfall."
"I'm no random mook, girl." Salfraslatar hissed, "and I'd advisssssssse you to hold your tongue, sssssssssssince you are in my cussssssssstody now. Asssssssssss for the othersssssssss... Zemlya wantsssssssss to ssssssssssssee Ssssssssssilvessssssssstron perssssssssssssonally, and the toy train issssssssssss to be sssssssssssssent to Ssssssssssssssterben for inssssssssssssspectssssssssssssssshun."
"I can't understand a word of that." Hornby James whined.
Two snakemen stepped forward and grabbed the toy train. "It'sssssssssssss the mad doctor for you!" Hissed one evilly.
"Hey! Hold on! Our little group isn't supposed to separate! We're a thing! How could you!" Protested Hornby James as he was carried offscreen.
"Alright, Silvestron, come with me." Moltana ordered, grabbing Percy Silver and dragging him away.
"Bye, Hailey!" Percy Silver said excitedly. "The nice lady and I are getting some candy!"
Woman In Orange glared at Moltana's retreating figure, seething.
"Woman In Orange." Salfraslatar whispered from behind her. "Come with me if you wissssssssssssh to live."
Woman In Orange whirled around. "Gaka meme gushuru acceber ain ylime ycrep semaj nodrog samoht fo stsisnoc maet maets eht!"
Nothing happened.
"The ambient evil of Desssssssszeld isssssssss sssssssssssso ssssssssssssstrong you Colorfolk can't even usssssssssse your magic without your artifactssssssssssss."
Woman In Orange just glared, then turned and followed Salfraslatar down a dark alley into....
THE DEPTHS OF DESZELD!!!
*******
Don't miss Part 2: An Offer You Can't Refussssssse, where Salfraslatar reveals his real mission, and gains an unlikely ally.
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Post by Toz76 on Nov 6, 2017 1:37:00 GMT -5
THIS POST IS SO LONG I WILL BE FUTURE POSTING IT IN FOUR PARTS
PART 1) Don't Split The Party PART 2) An Offer You Can't Refussssssssssssssse PART 3) Lord Ainz Does The Exposition PART 4) Based On A True Story
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AN OFFER YOU CAN'T REFUSSSSSSSSSSE
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Salfraslatar hurried Woman In Orange along the streets of Deszeld, finally reaching "Guunther Goatman's Pizza and Sports Bar".
"Now, Woman In Orange, you will ssssssssssee the true eksssssssstent of our evil." He turned to the obese harpy behind the counter. "I'd like one pizza for ussssss to sssssshare. With... pineapple."
"Oh, please. Pineapple on pizza doesn't bother me." Woman In Orange rolled her eyes.
"Then I'll do ssssssssssomething even eviler." Salfraslatar pulled out a kit-kat. A look of horror appeared on Woman In Orange's face.
"No. You wouldn't dare."
"Try me." Salfraslatar lifted the candy to his mouth.
"You can't just bite into it! You have to break it! What kind of monster just eats kit-kats unbroken?"
"Now you ssssssssssee how ssssssssseriousssssssly we take evil." Salfraslatar hissed, smirking. "Now, unlessssssss you want me to desssssssssecrate thisssssss candy, you will do eksssssssssactly assssssss I ssssssssssssay."
Woman In Orange shivered, intimidated.
Salfraslatar began expositioning. "Ssssssssssomeone hassssssss been leaking Esssssssssss-oh-em ssssssssssssecretssssssssssss to my former fakssssssssssshun, the GOD."
"And you want my help to frame someone so you can continue spying for them unhindered. Got it."
"Oh, pleassssssse. I'm not a GOD sssssssspy. That would be sssssssso obviousssssssss. GOD ssssssspiesssssss are alwayssssss the lasssst persssssson you eksssssspect, like the "Dr Quinn, Medisssssine Woman" parody Vee-eee-ssssssssssee had."
"Maybe it's a double bluff."
"Thisssssss is eksssssssatly why I'm ussssssssing you. The leaderssssssss of Esssssss-oh-em think the ssssssssame way. I've been able to prove my innosssssssssensssssssse to the Calamatiessssssss and the Dragoon Generalsssssss, but the Ssssssssssins and the Nine ssssssssstill ssssssssussssspect me. I need to unmask the real sssssssssspy and clear my name ssssssssso I can overthrow Hannibal more eassssssssily. To do that, I need ssssssssomeone like you."
"If you're not a GOD spy, why would you leave them for a lower-ranking position in SOM?"
"Are you sssssssstill on thisssssss? Fine, whatever. I wassssssss actually sssssssspying on GOD for Esssssssss-oh-em. I wasssssss one of two bounty hunterssssssss Lord Ainsssssss hired for what he called "Operation Pythagorassssssssss". My job was to infiltrate GOD, heavily influence them, then return to Essssss-oh-em to be here on thisssssssssss date to resssssssssseive a package the other bounty hunter planted on Sssssssssssilvesssssssstron. That package has already been delivered. He sssssssaid my part of the plan wasssssss over after that and I could do whatever I want with you, which issssss why I'm going to transsssssssform you into a harpy and have you invessssssstigate the lower rankssssss to find the sssssssssspy."
"That's really convoluted WAIT WHAT!?"
Woman In Orange stared at her reflection in the pizza pan. Her skin was now gray and flaky, she had sprouted a beak, and her clothes were now rags.
"Your harpy name issssssss Okeefe. Only I can lift the sssssssspell on you, which I will only do when the ssssssspy isssssss found. Oh, and if you don't find the ssssspy in 100 hourssssss, the sssssssspell killssssss you."
Okeefe screamed.
****************
Don't miss Part 3: Lord Ainz Does The Exposition, where Sterben has a shitty evening and we learn more about "Operation Pythagoras".
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Post by frankthetriviaman on Nov 6, 2017 11:21:33 GMT -5
Well don't forget tug- there's two kinds of harpies. The ones that look "pretty" (I.e. The "modern interpretation" harpies) and the "ugly" harpies (I.e. Classical interpretations)
Seems Toz was going for the classical take
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Post by Toz76 on Nov 6, 2017 17:52:59 GMT -5
I figure there's room in our story for two kinds of harpies. Either way, ugly harpies are funnier.
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Post by Toz76 on Nov 6, 2017 23:56:48 GMT -5
THIS POST IS SO LONG I WILL BE FUTURE POSTING IT IN FOUR PARTS
PART 1) Don't Split The Party PART 2) An Offer You Can't Refussssssssssssssse PART 3) Lord Ainz Does The Exposition PART 4) Based On A True Story
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LORD AINZ DOES THE EXPOSITION
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Sterben's Deszeld Lab was insane. Filled with bubbling cauldrons and strange contraptions of all design, it was the perfect stomping ground for SOM's resident mad scientist. Moltana very nearly died seven times just opening the door.
"Mister Sterben, sir? I have a toy for you..." the mage yelled.
"You're Tartaros' brat, aren't you? Tell him I don't want any more of his soul-stealing amulets. Mas science is only fun when it's directed at someone else."
"It's not from Tartaros. It's from Salfraslatar."
"Salfraslatar?" Sterben poked his head up from behind a pile of cursed books. "Isn't he a GOD spy?"
"I don't know anything about that, I'm new." Moltana replied. "All I know is he said you might want this trinket that used to belong to Silvestron."
"Silvestron? Well, why didn't you say so?" In a flash, Sterben had swiped the bag from Moltana and carried it to a workbench, dumping the contents unceremoniously.
"Hey now! I'm not cheap, you know!" Hornby James snapped.
"Huh. I heard rumours of a GOD weapon disguised as a toy train, but I always thought it was an Edward. Ah well. Still fun to investigate."
"I'll have you know I have unimaginable power and cannot be disabled by any means." Hornby James. "As long as I have power, I cannot be stopped."
"Well, that's a shame." Sterben snarked, taking out the batteries."
"Dang it."
"That's odd... model trains get their power from the tracks. Why do you have batteries? Maybe there's something nested up in here..."
"Yeah, I keep a spare condom there just in case, you know how it is." Hornby James said with a wink in Moltana's direction. Moltana died a little inside.
"No, really, there's some sort of secondary power source behind your face." Sterben said, pulling out a SOM Patent Double-Action Haskellium Jaguar-4300 Bifurcated Screwdriver. "Just let me."
"Hey, careful! You'll scratch up my face! I'll have you know-"
Suddenly, the screwdriver hit upon a hidden button in Hornby James' left eye. All at once, he changed. His eyes turned yellow, and a voice enimated from his frame.
"If you are hearing this prerecorded message, it means you have used a SOM Patent Double-Action Haskellium Jaguar-4300 Bifurcated Screwdriver to activate my sleeper mode. Lord Ainz Ooal Gown has already been notified."
"Well I'll be damned." Sterben muttered. "I owe him 20 goats."
"Why?" Moltana asked.
"He was bragging one day about having found a way to plant a bug on Silvestron. I said it couldn't be done, and he set up a wager."
"Indeed I did, so pay up." Said a booming voice from behind.
Out stepped an Elder Lich, robed in black, gold, and blue, and carrying a golden cane. It was the one the women called Daddy Ainz, the men called "Yes sir, of course sir, don't kill me sir", and the animals called "at least he doesn't draw it out like Keyes". The one, the only. Ainz Ooal Gown.
"I see you've found my little bug. Very good, Sterben, but I'll take it from here."
"Yes sir, of course sir, don't kill me sir," Sterben began, "but I have to ask... how?"
"It's quite a story, requiring a fair amount of exposition. Before I begin, perhaps we should dispose of Tartaros' wench."
"Please don't, Daddy Ainz." Moltana muttered, cringing slightly. "I can be useful to you."
"Yeah, she knows too much, and Tartaros would never forgive you for killing a perfectly good mook." Sterben chimed in.
"Very well. Then I will let both of you in on... Operation Pythagoras."
Sterben pulled out a bag of candies and handed them to Moltana. "Some people like to snack during stories."
"Thanks." Moltana said, popping one into her mouth.
"It was a very simple plan, really. The whole point was to destabilize VEC. So I hired a former VEC member by the name of Kendarboo Flickerbee."
There was a sudden gasp of shock. Moltana had suddenly grown about 7 cup sizes. "Eat another candy, it'll reverse the affect," Sterben said hurriedly.
Lord Ainz ignored all this. "Kendarboo already had a plan to overthrow VEC, so I offered him some help establishing his cult in exchange for him trading some corrupt prisms to the French Colorwomen. I knew they'd eventually end up in the hands of someone who would try to recreate Bachmann Edward, and I also knew someone who wanted to recreate Bachmann Edward would be someone who would go after Silvestron to try to "save" them."
"That plan leaves a lot to chance." Sterben observed, as Moltana freaked out about the cow horns she had sprouted.
"That's where the second bounty hunter came in. A disillusioned GOD member who could manipulate everything to make sure the pieces were all in play tonight. Now, we have a living record of the last year of Silvestron's life, which we can use in converting him to our cause."
Moltana was now shrinking out of her clothes.
"Diabolical. So now what will you do?" Sterben asked.
"Recombine the Prism Of Pain to find out exactly what Hornby James knows, and then pass that info on to the other Dragoons. You, meanwhile, need to fix the mook and then send her to Redfox to fill him in on our progress." Lord Ainz grabbed Hornby James and strutted off.
Sterben picked up tiny Moltana and set to work de-transforming her. "The Kinky Kandies seem to be a success."
Moltana was too distracted to be mad. She was really going up in the world! At this rate Metalicana would be bedding her tomorrow. She just had to be careful. The last thing she wanted to do was blow her one chance.
**********
Don't miss part 4: Based On A True Story, where Percy Silver has his first kiss and learns far more about the Elbafian sex industry then he really wanted to know.
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Post by Toz76 on Nov 7, 2017 1:04:16 GMT -5
THIS POST IS SO LONG I WILL BE FUTURE POSTING IT IN FOUR PARTS
PART 1) Don't Split The Party PART 2) An Offer You Can't Refussssssssssssssse PART 3) Lord Ainz Does The Exposition PART 4) Based On A True Story
***************
BASED ON A TRUE STORY
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Zemlya was not your ordinary SOM general.
For one thing, she was in her late teens, and was gravitating towards that life. Ever since she'd arrived at Deszeld, she'd locked herself into her cavernous, pitch-black room, purchased a set of "normal teen" clothes, and binge-watched some of the finest in Elbaf's bootleg "anime". The other Sons decided it was a phase.
Today, she was experimenting with a flower crown, crop top, and jeans. All black, of course. She was still evil. She sat on her hilariously oversized sofa, which had a back 80 feet high despite only fitting two people, munching popcorn and watching the end of "Growl's Flying Fortress".
She was interrupted by a knock on the door. "It's Bone Andrea. I have Silvestron."
Zemlya sighed, got up, and walked to the door. Who cares about this Silvestron guy? Just cast Spiked Tentacles Of Forced Intrusion and let Redfox deal with him.
But when she threw open the comically oversized door, she was not expecting to see someone so...
"Hi!" Percy Silver said innocently.
"Ah, Silvestron. I am Zemlya. Welcome to my Temple Of Eternal Despair."
"By the way, the zit cream you ordered is on the way." Bone Andrea reported.
"Damnit Bone Andrea, piss off before I kill you off. Silvestron and I have things to discuss." And Zemlya pulled him in, slamming the door behind her. Bone Andrea lingered for a moment, knowing she probably wouldn't appear again, before sighing and wandering off.
"Nice room." Percy Silver said cheerfully, looking around.
"I was just about to watch "Ghosted Off". Want to join me?" Zemlya asked. "I can make some more popcorn."
"Ooh, yes please!" Percy Silver said, bouncing on the comically oversized sofa.
Zemlya ran off with the bowl, turned down a comically oversized hallway, and freaked out. Silvestron was here! In her room! And he was such a... such a babe! She knew she had to play her cards carefully. A powerful and experienced dark mage like Silvestron probably had little interest in a wannabe villainess like her.
"Here's the DVD!" She exclaimed, returning eagerly. She plopped down on the sofa and turned on the Normal Sized, But Comically Undersized Considering The Rest Of The Room TV.
The movie was about an elf girl who gets trapped at a magical bathhouse and has to rescue her family and escape.
"I feel like I've seen this movie before, except it was Japanese and called "Spiri-""
"Shhhhhh!" Interrupted Zemlya. "3WSRisaworkoffictionanyresemblencetopersonsorstudioghiblifilmslivingordeadiscompletelycoincidental."
The two settled in on opposite ends of the couch and began snacking on popcorn.
"You know, apparently this film is based on the Elbafian sex industry. There's lots of symbolism, like when Tauriel gives up her name, which is what prostitutes-"
"What's sex?" Percy Silver asked.
"...you're Silvestron. How do you not know that?"
"I'm not Silvestron anymore, I'm Percy Silver. I'm a good guy."
GODDAMNIT. This was unexpected.
Zemlya was appalled, but she knew a little cuddling would win him over. She began using her powers to surreptitiously lower the temperature in the room. By about halfway through the film, Percy Silver was shivering.
"I'm getting cold. Wanna share a blanket?" She asked.
"Sure." Percy Silver replied, completely clueless.
Soon, the two were snuggled together. Zemlya's hand "accidentally" ended up in Percy's, and her head "just happened" to nuzzle up against his chest. Surprisingly, Percy Silver didn't object.
"You know, it's interesting." Zemlya said. "This movie is about a girl who falls in love with a boy who's secretly a dragon. In real life, it's boys who fall in love with dragon girls."
"Really?"
"Yeah. By the way, did I mention I'm part dragon?"
Percy Silver was amazed. "Maybe someone will fall in love with you!"
GODDAMNIT
Soon, the movie was over, but Zemlya had one last trick up her sleeve. A trick she'd gained from some trashy teen romance Raios had bought for her to convince her to come to the Extreme Bloodbath Gladiator Games.
"Wanna play truth or dare?"
"What's truth or dare?" Percy Silver asked.
GODDAMNIT
"It's quite simple. I ask you Truth or Dare. If you say Truth, you have to answer any question I ask you. If I say dare, you have to do whatever I tell you."
"Sure, sounds fun!"
"Alright, Silvestron, Truth Or Dare?"
"Um.... Truth!" Percy Silver decided.
"What do you think of me?" Zemlya asked.
Percy Silver thought. "You're pretty cool. You wear black a lot. You like cuddling, which is nice."
"Aww, thanks!"
"You're welcome!"
"Ok, your turn." Zemlya ordered after a pause.
"My turn for what?"
GODDAMNIT
"Now you ask me truth or dare."
"Oh! Ok. Truth or dare?"
"Dare." Zemlya smirked.
Percy Silver was terrified. Zemlya was a fun new friend, but this game had too much thinking. But Zemlya liked thinking, and Percy wanted Zemlya to like him, even though she had questionable views on morality and called him "Silvestron".
"Surprise me." He decided after a while.
"Ooh, that's a tough one." Zemlya smirked. "I'll have to think about it."
Oh no! Now his new friend had to think too! Percy Silver tried to think up an apology, but then she was kissing him, and he was kissing back, and he decided it was best to just stop thinking for a while.
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Post by Toz76 on Feb 19, 2018 1:12:06 GMT -5
Gonna future post this one first because there's something in it that requires Tug's approval. ******** "So, Woman In Orange." Zemlya smirked. "How long have you known Silvestron?" Woman In Orange stuttered. "Y-you knew I was a colorwoman this whole time and did nothing?" "Just because I'm a villain doesn't mean I'm going to explain myself. Now, you're powerless without your artifact, so I suggest you hold still so your death can be relatively painless." "Wait, death?" Percy looked worried. "Don't kill my friend, Zem!" GODDAMMIT "Who's going to stop me?" Zemlya cackled. "The Bronze Mage himself came to rescue you two. His brain is sitting in a jar in Sterben's lab right now." "You... killed Bronze Diesel?" Percy asked, his lip quivering. "Where do I start... first off, it wasn't me who did the killing, it-" "NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAARRRGGHH!"Percy Silver released a primal scream as he suddenly began levitating above Zemlya. "My god, he's become Silvestron!" Silvestron drew the Sordon and slashed it at Zemlya, catching her in the side. Black energy swirled through the sword as it copied Zemlya's powers and transferred them to Silvestron. "You killed Bronzy! I hate hate HATE you!!!"
"Wait! I didn't kill him! Sterben did!" Silvestron crackled in magical fury. A portal popped into existence behind him, and he swam through it. ********** Sterben and Moltana were busy pickling the various components of Bronze Mage's body when the portal opened and deposited a furious Silvestron. "YOU!"
Sterben shivered as Silvestron's voice echoed through the room. Moltana tried to run, but a few well-placed uses of Paincauser's "pain beams" 1 took her down. "YOU KILLED BRONZY!"
Sterben cowered. "Don't hurt me! I'm well liked!" Silvestron found the jar with Bronze Mage's brain and shattered it, levitating it next to him. Bits of Bronze Mage began emerging from various cabinets, and his form began to take shape. But there was a lot missing. An entire leg, his heart and lungs, most of his arteries and nerves, his large intestines, his left pectoral, and several ribs were some of the omissions. "WHERE IS THE REST OF HIM?""I already used parts of him for mad science! I'm sorry!" Silvestron glanced around the lab, Bronze Mage's brain levitating next to him like some sort of disturbed jellyfish. Suddenly, Silvestron's gaze landed on Sterben. "What are you- no. No no NO! I was just following orders! I'll do anything! You like dinosaurs? I can make you a T-Rex army!" With a sickening crunch, the top of Sterben's skull popped off, and his brain floated out, dropped unceremoniously on the floor in chunks. Silvestron levitated Bronze Mage's brain in place, and began knitting the nerves together telepathically. He was no brain surgeon, but he did an OK job. After that, he reattached the skull and vanished with a pop. The Bronze-Sterben hybrid colapsed to the floor. Moltana looked up, threw up, and passed out. ********* Bronze Mage stepped forward and examined his surroundings. He appeared to be on some sort of mental plane. "Where are we?" A voice asked. "Didn't I kill you? Is this my ironic hell?" The Bronze Mage turned to Sterben. "You're that guy from SOM! What the hell is going on?" "Well, Davy Silver or whatever couldn't put you back together, so he ripped my brain out of my body and shoved yours in. The fact that I'm still here in what I assume is your subconscious is conclusive evidence in favor of either the soul or plot twists. Fascinating. I wish I had my lab." "Well, it's your body, can't you just control it? You should still be in the lab." Sterben sighed. "I'm afraid that's not how it works. We're multiple personalities of each other. That means we have to fight for control in your subconscious." "Wait, am I permanently trapped inside your body?" "Unless I can find a way to get rid of you, yep." The Bronze Mage was confused. "But, if I'm not in control, and you aren't in control, who is?" Sterben rolled his eyes. "Probably some amusing hybrid of our names, like "Bronze Scientist" or "Hey, you two! I'm Mortem!" Said a figure in a Bronze lab coat. "Mortem? Oh, because my name is German for death and you're named after a Roman emperor... that's geeky." "I'm in charge of this here body, so you two just sit back and enjoy the ride." In the real world, Sterben's body opened its eyes. ********* Percy Silver fell out of the portal onto the rooftop, coughing. Zemlya and Woman in Orange ran to him. "Zem? Hailey? What happened?" "Don't you remember? Sil-" Zemlya interrupted Woman In Orange. "Hailey here betrayed you, remember?" Woman In Orange was shocked. "What!?" "Oh, don't act like you don't know. You let Hornby James get destroyed and the Bronze Mage die. It was all her fault!" Percy Silver was too weak and confused to be mad. "But... she's my friend!" "She's a fake friend." Zemlya said with venom in her voice. "But don't worry, I'll take care of her." Zemlya grabbed Woman In Orange with a shadow tendril and slammed her into the side of a building. Woman In Orange crashed through the window and lay on the floor, bleeding and in immense pain. The pain grew every second and she prayed for either unconsciousness or death to take her, but neither did. And the worst part? She survives this arc. Back on the roof, Zemlya helped Percy to his feet. "I'm sorry about that, Percy. I know it's hard. But you need someone who cares to stand up for you, and I can be that person." Percy smiled weakly. "Thank you, Zem." Zemlya kissed his cheek, smirking. The biggest threat to her control over Percy Silver had been eliminated. And she'd seen just how powerful he could be. This day was going great. "Uh-oh! I've got a boo-boo!" GODDAMMIT 1see thread 1, page 30ish. The Sordon can steal powers from any mage, and Honeybadger used it on the entire senior VEC staff
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Post by Toz76 on Apr 5, 2018 0:10:23 GMT -5
I'll probably end up writing the entire Lightbender arc as one big post, since no one has a fucking clue anymore and we can get to the reboot faster. First, though, this post (takes place after a battle breaks out, serves as the climax for my part of the Deszeld arc):
When Raios reached the battlement, he was met by a strange sight: Salfraslatar, Thomas Gold, and Moltana standing in a circle. Thomas Gold had guns trained on both of them, Salfraslatar had a Barrier covering his form, and Moltana was holding the Prism Of Pain in front of her like a shield.
"What the hell is going on here?" Raios asked.
"I've found the GOD sssssssssspy, massssster." Salfraslatar hissed, gesturing at Moltana.
"Who is that? She's just some grunt." Raios said.
"Not jussssst sssssssome grunt." Salfraslatar smirked. "Ssssssshe's got closssssse tiessssss to both Tartarosssss and Ainz, and..."
"Save the exposition for someone without a speech impediment, I figured it out like 5 pages ago." Raios snarked. "Now can we kill her and get on with-"
"TOMMY!"
Thomas Gold looked over Raios' shoulder and saw a shadowy woman chasing a familiar figure.
"P...Percy?"
Percy Silver pushed past Raios and Salfraslatar and hugged Thomas Gold tight. "I missed you! Bronze Mage said you went to a puppy farm upstate!"
"I can't believe it's you!" Thomas Gold murmured, dazed.
"Get out of the way, boy." Raios snapped, getting back up. "That man is a GOD agent, and he must die."
"No, he's my friend." Percy Silver said defiantly.
"He'ssssssss an enemy of the ssssssstate and-"
"Let me handle this." Raios pointed his finger at Thomas Gold and began one of his most powerful verbal spells. "Crippling Shadow Otter Gn-"
"DON'T HURT MY FRIEND!"
Percy Silver drew the Sordon and pointed it at Raios. A bolt of blue energy shot out of it, blasting a Raios-shaped crater into the battlement (don't worry, he got better).
Salfraslatar, crouched behind his Barrier, gasped. "Sssssssilvesssssstron!"
Thomas Good decided to take advantage of the distraction. He turned to Moltana. "Sorry about this. GOD appreciates your sacrifice."
"I don't even know who you-" Moltana was cut off abruptly by a bullet to the skull.
"Finally, one less character to keep track of." Thomas Gold muttered, grabbing the Prism Of Pain and leaping off the battlement into a waiting ship below.
As the ship sailed away, dodging fire from SOMGRA, Thomas Gold glanced back up at the ramparts. "I'll come back for you, Percy." He murmured.
Percy Silver fell to his knees, exhausted. Zemlya ran over to him.
"Are you okay, Percy?"
"What happened?"
"You saved the day, Percy." Zemlya lied.
"Oh, cool!" Percy looked over and spotted Moltana's corpse. "She's just sleeping, right?"
GODDA-
Zemlya smiled sweetly. "Yes, she's just sleeping, Percy. She's got a long drive ahead of her to the puppy farm upstate."
*******
From GOD home base in Iceland, Zima and Labyrinth watched everything unfold with a scrying spell.
"Welp, so much for that prophecy. Percy Silver is definitely Silvestron." Zima noted.
"Yep."
"Kind of ruins the plan, doesn't it."
"No, not really. Operation Lightbender is still on the table, and Gold is still in the Vanguard. Why not give your role there to Thomas Gold?"
Zima thought. "Hmm... not a bad idea."
Labyrinth cackled. "You'll see. In just a week, the Confederacy will fall, and the Servants and Sudrians will be begging to join the guild. We will be unstoppable!"
"Not with a cliche villain boast like that, we won't."
"I know, but it's a Xanatos Gambit. Whatever happens, it's advantage: GOD."
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